There are some dating coaches that advocate approaching LOTS of women. What do I mean by LOTS? 20, 30, 40, or even 50+ women in a day.

There is no improvement being made when approaching is taken to that level.

How do you get COMFORTABLE in your own skin and comfortable in the interaction when your mind is preoccupied with the number of approaches that you’re trying to accomplish? You don’t.

It should be really really really difficult to do 20-30 approaches in a day unless you’re literally approaching all day.

The goal when approaching a woman, isn’t to just slip your way in, get a phone number, and then get out before your uncomfortable emotions overtake you… The goal is to open a conversation, relax, get comfortable, and to build a solid connection with the woman (or group if the woman is in a group)

You can only outrun your uncomfortable emotions for so long.

Without a focus on quality interactions, you will not overcome your fear of approaching and you will not learn to get comfortable in the eye of the storm.

The eye of the storm = Talking to a woman you’re attracted to and fully owning the moment. Fully feeling your emotions. Not turning away from your fear.

When you open a conversation with a woman, she commits to talking to you, and you are very centered, rooted, and engaged in the conversation, you are drastically improving your chances of exchanging phone numbers with her and you are drastically improving your chances of her actually following through and seeing you again.

When you are fully engaged in this way, you are also doing wonders for your own mindset, emotions, and you are gaining valuable experience.

Have you ever had the experience of trying to read a book too quickly? Maybe you were anxious to get through a chapter for a class you were taking. What happens when you try to read too quickly or when you’re not fully settled in and engaged in what you’re reading? You don’t retain any of the information or you have to keep going back and rereading to soak it up.

The same is true when approaching and interacting with women. It may be uncomfortable at first, but through conscious effort and not looking for any shortcuts, you will get more comfortable facing “the eye of the storm”. This is where true improvement is made and this is what you must overcome if you want to really connect with women.

Stop looking for ways to avoid your uncomfortable emotions, your fears, and take a “no shortcuts” approach to your improvement.

Face THE EYE OF THE STORM… Feel the emotions that come your way to the fullest when in that moment. This is the ONLY way to conquer yourself and master your emotions.

Quality > Quantity

Focusing on quality interactions MUST come before quantity.

There are very few rules in improving yourself with women that must be followed all the time and this is one of them. Off the top of my head I can’t think of any reason to sacrifice a quality interaction with a woman just so you can get another approach under your belt.

Learn to get settled into your conversations. Be real. Be centered. Be comfortable. Get in the game. Don’t run from your emotions… Accept your emotions.